Rivky Stein was only 18 when she married 26 year old Yoel Weiss, who she mistakenly thought was good man. Weiss had arranged for the marriage through a matchmaker, paying her $18,000 in fees. The two were wed in a traditional Orthodox Jewish ceremony. What came after is a shocking case of rape and torment for this young Jewish mother, and story all too common among Orthodox Jews.
Stein recalled feeling frightened and trapped from the very first night they were wed. The man she thought kind and spiritual turned violent and controlling, making it clear that she was simply a piece of his property, and that she had no rights whatsoever. Repeated assaults and rapes resulted in the birth of their two children. After their births Stein claims Weiss locked her away in a room with the small children, where they were sometimes starved. If they did get fed, it was “roughly two meals a day, normally reused chicken soup.” The children became incredibly thin and malnourished.
If she needed to go outside of the house, she was always accompanied by Weiss. If the children were along with the couple, Weiss made sure that he was holding one or both of the children to ensure that Stein would not flee. In a typical behavior of a controlling and abusive individual, Weiss cut Stein off from her friends and family, and monitored her every move, even phone calls, to make sure she was not able to get in touch with them for help. With nowhere to go and no one to turn to for help, she was stuck in the marriage, and treated as a slave to her abusive husband.
In the summer of 2012, after four years of captivity, and after two previously failed attempts to leave, Stein saw an opportunity to escape, and she fled with only the clothes she was wearing, and her two children. She then obtained an order of protection, which is supposed to keep Weiss away from her and their two young children. Unfortunately, Weiss has violated the order and has been arrested five times. He refutes these claims, saying he has never violated the order of protection, and has never been arrested.
In court documents Stein claims she was “held captive, starved, forcibly isolated and frequently the victim of marital rape.” When she was late in pregnancy with their second child, her husband would drag her into their bedroom and violently rape her. Stein was not only terrified for herself, but for their unborn child. In another sick attempt to gain power, and make Stein feel worthless, Weiss would often make her write lists about what she had done wrong, or how she had disrespected him. In fact, Weiss reportedly told her that the only way he would put their young song into school was for her to write a list of 30 things she had done to disrespect him.
Among Orthodox Jews, women are officially viewed as “separate but equal,” however, many Orthodox Jewish women report that they are treated like second-class citizens, looked down upon and denigrated by their husbands. In Israel, there have been recent protests by women to fight back against this oppressive treatment. American singer Barbara Streisand also spoke out against treatment of women after a trip to Israel, saying “it’s distressing to read about women in Israel being forced to sit in the back of the bus or when we hear about `Women of the Wall’ having metal chairs thrown at them when they attempt to peacefully and legally pray.”
Many feel that among Orthodox Jews, the “separate but equal” law creates a culture in which women are viewed as lesser than men, and Stein has been a victim of this treatment. In this shocking case of rape and torment for this young Jewish mother, Weiss sent his wife to Canada at one point during their marriage to work and make extra money to help with debt they were in. This didn’t last long though, as he wasn’t able to control her whereabouts, and almost immediately sent for her to come home. After that she was forced to live in a one room bathroom in her in-law’s house for several months.
Weiss claims that all of Stein’s allegations are completely false. However, a court mediator who works with the family and has talked to the couple at length, claims he believes Stein’s allegations against her husband, and reports that she was a slave to Weiss for years, while people watched and condoned his actions without helping her.
Unfortunately, even though she has escaped from the slave-like conditions she was being forced to live in, she is still trapped in the marriage. As is common in the Orthodox Jewish religion and a serious problem for women trying to escape abusive marriages, Weiss is refusing to grant her with a divorce. Stein still lives in fear of her husband, living with five locks on the door in a small rundown apartment, while working two jobs, and trying to give her young children a normal life. While she is in a sense free, she is still chained to an abusive man, who still believes that she is his property. This is only one shocking case of rape and torment for young mothers. Women all over the world are stuck in these types of marriages, struggling to escape from their chains of abuse.
